You are:

Absorbing, Acceptable, Admirable, Adorable, Agreeable, Airy, Alluring, Ambrosial, Amiable, Angelic, Appealing, Attractive, Beauteous, Beautiful, Bewitching, Bonny, Boss, Captivating, Charismatic, Charming, Cheerful, Cher, Choice, Classy, Comely, Cute, Dainty, Darling, Dazzling, Dear, Delectable, Delicate, Delicious, Delightful, Desirable, Diaphanous, Disarming, Dishy, Divine, Dreamboat, Dreamy, Effective, Electrifying, Elegant, Enamoring, Enchanting, Endearing, Engaging, Engrossing, Enhancing, Enthralling, Enticing, Entrancing, Ethereal, Excellent, Exquisite, Eye-Catching, Eyeful, Fair, Fascinating, Feeble, Fetching, Fine, Foxy, Frail, Glamorous, Good-Looking, Gorgeous, Graceful, Grand, Gratifying, Handsome, Heavenly, Hot, Ideal, Infatuating, Intriguing, Inviting, Irresistible, Lacy, Light, Likable, Looker, Lovable, Lovely, Luring, Luscious, Magnetizing, Magnificent, Marvelous, Neat, Nice, Palatable, Petite, Picture, Pleasant, Pleasing, Precious, Prepossessing, Presentable, Pretty, Provocative, Pulchritudinous, Radiant, Rapturous, Rare, Ravishing, Recherché, Refined, Resplendent, Savory, Seducing, Seductive, Seemly, Select, Sexy, Shapely, Sightly, Soft, Splendid, Statuesque, Stunning, Suave, Sublime, Subtle, Superb, Superior, Sweet, Symmetrical, Taking, Taking, Tantalizing, Tasteful, Tasty, Tempting, Tender, Thin, Titillating, Toothsome, Trim, Welcome, Well-Chosen, Well-Formed, Well-Made, Winning, Winsome, Wonderful

Bacon Flavored Breath Mints

Bacon. Flavored. Breath. Mints.

Call me heretical, but I’m pretty sure that this is part of the sign of the Apocalypse:

And I saw, and, look! a pale horse; and the one seated upon it had the name Death. And Hades was closely following him.

The Revelation of John, Chapter 6, Verse 8

If you’re so inclined, you may purchase these on Amazon: Bacon Flavored Mints. Not an affiliate link, BTW.

UGG Boots are stupid

There was a giant ad in my email inbox for UGG boots, and it dawned on me how stupid they were. Not so much the boots themselves, but the fact that the company managed to convince otherwise sane girls to walk around all summer long with WINTER BOOTS ON.

Give credit to their marketing department though. Genius. It must have gone something like this:

“Sales are down Jim, what ya got?”

“Me? Uhh… Convince pretty girls that their feet need to be warmed by our cozy sheepskin boots, not just in the winter, but all year ’round?”

“Jim, you’re a natural.”

That’s how I imagine it must have went, except with an Australian accent.

And their logo is uggly. Sorry, I couldn’t resist.

Nolan Ryan vs Robin Ventura = Walmart Profiteering!

I was reading a recent article about the Seattle Mariner’s pitcher Cliff Lee getting ejected from a Cactus League spring training game, when someone posted information about a scuffle between Nolan Ryan and Robin Ventura way back in the day.

As a kid, my favorite player was Nolan Ryan. He was like 80 years old, yet still better than most other pitchers. What happened one day was that Ryan beaned Ventura with his first pitch, and Robin didn’t like that so he charged the mound.

Walmart memories

Hilarity ensues, as Nolan Ryan calmly puts him into a headlock and starts whipping him with his fists of fury. It’s so humorous, if sadly violent, that Walmart sells autographed photos of the beating. The fact that they sell that photo is way funnier than the actual fight. Way to go Walmart!